Archives for posts with tag: feminism

Wow, has it been a minute or what. Once upon a time I started this little personal hobby blog about spas I was visiting just to talk about that simply. I loved speaking about each interior, dissecting it, analyzing the service and services, you name it. Now, after 7 years, I have definitely visited quite a few spas. Yet, I haven’t felt inspired to write about an experience since almost exactly one year ago. I’ve written about spas so many times, and am also a design consultant that critiques spaces on the daily, so I just don’t feel that inspired to dissect them anymore because, well, I simply feel I’m at a point where I know what makes for a good spa and what doesn’t. & To top it all off, I ironically found myself in a relationship with a man who is a CEO of an international spa company. How’s that for serendipity?

As of late though, I have been itching to talk. About what? Things. Random things. Things that come to me, and I say to myself, “Oh I could really dive into that!” Then the thought goes, and I don’t get around to doing it. Time is money. So now, right here, I am going to officially denounce this “spa blog” as a spa blog and change it over to just simply, my blog. If a topic comes to me, I’m going to write about it, vent, get it out and just say I did.

I think the feeling of wanting to talk stems from a few things. Number one, and most obvious, if you know even the slightest about my last two years, I’ve become an expat. I live far far away from all my loved ones, friends, colleagues and a world I knew like the back of my hand (hence why I needed newness). So it goes without saying that at times I find myself feeling quite isolated – and yes, I know, that was done by choice. Another reason I feel chatty is because I am experiencing so many new and different things, ways of life, cultures, career changes, relationship challenges / successes, because I am living abroad. Not always does a caption to a photo suffice, for me, as space-enough for what I really want to say.

I’ve thought about doing the whole YouTube vlogging thing, a lot, because I have always been quite a social person, and so many people have suggested I do…however as I have gotten older I really tend to like my privacy. I could never get up the gumption to post that one video I recorded talking about my first 9 months abroad. Who am I to talk about this topic? Yea, I’m living it – or more like figuring it out as I go. Did I go into it naively? Sure did. Up until a certain point I was merely surviving every day life. At the end of the 20 minute video my only advice is a cheesy: just do it – go – have faith. Perhaps I could post it just to see initial reactions? Who knows.

Also, why open myself to people’s criticisms? No thanks. It all just feels so invasive. They say what goes on the internet is forever on the internet. Are you comfortable with that? I’m not. & I’m not so sure I want my person forever being there, long after I’m gone. Although, paradoxically I am already participating in another form of it all by posting photos on instagram and Facebook.

Le sigh…

What’s to lose though? If you’re a standup honest person, and you mean well, and you can see yourself being good at it? Why not? Although, there are those people from your past who love to come around and be internet bullies when you start to have a following,…so I have come to understand from people who post their lives on the internet.

I love when I hear advice about how to become an “influencer” or fashion blogger or what-have-you… it’s always: just start! Then, be consistent! It’s so simple, and so true. Kind of like my advice to just go abroad. The consistency thing is where I know I might fail for producing content because I don’t have friends here (or not a handful at least) to help me produce content I would need. Who wants to see a bunch of selfie productions? I’m also someone who likes to approach things with a bit of a strategy, or game plan, or mission and without that kind of structure I tend to think things become a bit of a waste of energy…like a chicken with it’s head cut off. Plus I wouldn’t initially be getting paid to do it. Again – need. structure.

So that’s where I have to narrow in on my “passions” and “talents” they say. What value can you provide the people with? And that, that question I cannot answer. I’m pretty self-aware and know myself. I know I’m passionate about health, design, travel, career, wealth, and family. The whole talent thing though? That’s where I struggle. I’ve always been a Jill of all Trades. Good at a lot of things but not fabulous at one. What can I do or say or provide that will attract the people’s attention? The views are what count!

Aside from the whole idea of vlogging floating around in my head I have more astute ideas like itching to go back to school for my Masters in Business. My brain has been so educated (or trained) for the arts that I am dying to activate the entrepreneur inside of me…rather than fallback on the trend of vlogging. Or even get a certificate of some kind whether it’s a nutrition degree, writing degree, IELTS (International English Language Testing System) degree or personal training certification.

With all that said, currently, career-wise, I’m happily (if not a little anxiously, obviously) focusing on my career(s) at hand. One is being a Home Critic for Plum Guide, a company based out of London, here in Barcelona, by consulting the design and amenities of homes to be added to the luxury vacation rental website’s collection. The other job being a remote Consult Designer for the online Interior Design company based out of America called Havenly. Both jobs are really appealing to me, especially considering that I’m consulting…something I’ve always wanted to move toward as an Interior Designer, plus both jobs keep my creative thirsts satiated fully. Not to mention, one job is fully remote which is extremely ideal considering I love to travel and love the idea of being able to make money while moving around the globe.

So even though I’m fairly isolated, don’t have a whole ton of friends around me (yet), and am toying with the idea of vlogging, I’ve found the positive in my solitude and “free time”: writing here again now, and up’ing my career game by working two jobs and pursuing education and entrepreneurial endeavors (as well as some fitness goals!). Because recall that, “6 months of hardcore focus and alignment can put you 5 years ahead in life – you can’t underestimate the power of consistency and desire. You have what it takes to become the best that you can be. You can’t doubt yourself. Harness your power, exceed your expectations.”

And I will leave you on that note. Tell me though, what are your thoughts on vlogging? Do you think it is a worthwhile pursuit? Do you watch vloggers? Or do you prefer reading? Do you think I should give it a shot?

 

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A long time ago I read a book called “Survival of the Prettiest: The Science of Beauty”. It was a fascinating book about the study of beauty, and why we are attracted to what we are attracted to. Written by Psychologist and Harvard Faculty Member Dr. Nancy Etcoff, she “argues that beauty is neither a cultural construction, an invention of the fashion industry, nor a backlash against feminism—it’s in our biology.” In parallel to the moment in my life when I read this book, I have always been highly interested in maintaining optimal health (re: minimal drinking, no drugs, organic food, regular exercise, good skin care etc.) and then, of course, the psychology behind attraction itself – be it the Law of Attraction (manifestation) or male to female physical attraction and then most importantly a persons wavelength, if you will, that attracts you. So with all that said, daily I feel grateful for my God-given physique and DNA. Even if I’m no Gisele Büdchen. Even if I’m only 5’1″ – You name it -I still make an effort mentally and physically to remain attractive to my own self as well as others immediately around me, and then people I can effect. We tend to hyper focus-in on our disliked traits. But that would be forgetting the bigger picture…the qualities that really matter, the attitude that really makes the difference in attraction and how little some of our “woes” matter.

The other day I stumbled upon a post via @streetartglobe who posted the story that National Geographic covered about a young female in middle America who “shot her face off” and is now the 40th person, documented, to have undergone a face transplant. Yes…another person’s face was surgically adhered to her face.

I don’t have much to say about this article besides the fact that it’s a fascinating advancement in biomedical procedures and it’s saddening that someone would try and take their own life…something that will forever baffle me. My heart goes out to her and her family.

If you are struggling with the ability to want to live and you are my friend – please, contact me. Let’s chat. Or you can call this hotline and talk to someone 1-800-273-8255 (USA). Or if you are somewhere else in the world refer to this list for suicide hotlines in your country.

Again, I am only here to voice how thankful I am for my life, and health, every single day and never ever taking it for granted, because God knows I have my own aging and hormonal, attitude ailments. From cystic acne, to blemishes, to melasma all out in the open on my face for all to see, I know how it can feel to be extremely self-conscious and defeated. Shout out to Clinique’s 7-day Blackhead Cleanser (morning & night) & the holy grail of beauty lines: Institute Esthederm’s Proplois Serum & Cream (I use at night). To have bad skin is one thing, but to have facial muscles that don’t work is another level of tragedy and hardship. People say it about me all the time – you can read my mood by my face…I’m just one of those people. And I quite like it that way 🙂

I share this because this is one girl’s journey through a troubled time, how she dealt with it, how she is having to deal with the consequences. I hope it helps someone understand how beautiful they really are in their God-given state, and how little some of the things we hyper focus-in on really matter…whether it’s physical or just a problem in our life, and how fragile – and beautiful – this ride of life we are on is…so we need to bask in it.  People love you, and maybe they haven’t shown it in some time, but they will the second you tell them, “I need loving because I don’t feel like carrying on.” (In one way or another…tell them in your own “need love and help” way.) And if one person doesn’t pick up or message back, try another. And then try the hotline if you have to. There are people who have felt like you. It’s not an uncommon feeling. What it is, is an ebb in a flow. & This too shall pass. & Don’t forget to check on your “strong”, social-butterfly friends too. 😉

Here’s the article link: How a Face Transplant Transformed a Young Women’s Life

Here’s the list of suicide hotlines around the world: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_suicide_crisis_lines

Here’s a newer song about this very topic which means to say you aren’t alone, someone else feels lonely too, and we need to be better about connecting to one another: One Republic – Can I get a Connection

Here’s a song, that to me, is obviously about materialism & millennials but the irony of that also because love really is a currency (fact). I’m not talking a monetary currency, but a way to lift the spirit of another – a wavelength, a currency, a vibe! SO easy! Smile. Compliment. Point out something great about the day. Whatever! Choose your ‘tude! Ivy Adara – Currency

& this is my current mood (beat, not lyrics): Walker & Royce – Role Models

If there’s anything I’ve learned while being abroad, being friendly makes life easier. Spread the word. Talk to strangers. Choose your ‘tude. Oh, and…make shit happen.

 

First thing to do, read the following article link. Then come back to my post and see what I had to say on this topic. And then best yet!…leave me your feedback. Give it to me!

The Side Effect Of Birth Control No One Ever Talks About.

My original response on Facebook to this, in an all-too informal Cali-girl accent was…”Tryn’a help my economy yoo ;)”

But seriously. Why is this not a dead ringer “duh”? I mean, c’mon. After seeing my own parents marriage fail, girls who depended on men all too much, and multiple friends who birthed children at a young age and then figuring out at my own young age I’ve got shit ‘ta do!…then that would mean that if I haven’t caught one of those ships yet, I’m going to try and catch the: “go in debt, learn a skill like a mother fucker, and then take multiple risks – fail a few times – and then make it doing one or some of those skills…and thennn have your offspring” boat. ::long sigh:: All I want is for my kids to feel safe. And I would like to give my kids more than I had, like any parent. I’m not talking about tangibility, I am talking about the ability to use things that are tangible in order to have experiences on this planet like no other. Things you can only dream of. I see the future. And it will look like something rad, something futuristic, that I can’t imagine actually. But it will be great, and it will take a great couple centuries of youth who understand a particular importance; the importance of starting on a solid grounding before jumping into a territory of love for selfish reasons. You don’t need that baby hunny, you need a smack on the face, a therapist, a goal and a massage. But hey, shit does happen. Till then, keep on keepin’ on and take preventative care of yourself.

That might have been a manipulative rant, but we all get dealt a set of cards as a good friend of mine once said. If we can help our young ladies figure this dream out at a young age, (seeing the world/gaining knowledge with no strings attached) then I think we have a very bright future. What the devil may do is another story this positivist doesn’t care to give the time of day to. Yes on Peace.

And in an all too ironic sign-off “Je suis Charlie.” We are you. Freedom of speech for all!

Goodnight!

#womenomics